Shall we dance?

I decided to take a dance class. Of the social variety. This class had tests, as classes tend to do, and there was a competition near the end of the semester.

My partner for that competition decided that we needed to practice. I agreed, seeing as we had a competition in a little over a week. Practice makes perfect, right? Or at least, practice makes "we know the steps and won't look like complete fools."

One of the practice rooms was open Friday late in the afternoon. Seeing as this was a time that didn't conflict with any other classes or work, I agreed to this time and location.

Suspicion should have been aroused when I learned my partner hadn't realized the dance competition was exactly seven days after our agreed practice time. He had only intended on practicing for the test that Monday. Practicing for tests was not exactly a habit I embraced. We practiced for the test, then practiced for our competition.

After an hour or so, we agreed that we had practiced a sufficient amount for that time and proceeded to change our shoes, put on our coats, and generally prepare for departure.

"So, have you had dinner yet?"

I paused, all of the sudden aware of the situation. Thankfully, I'd made plans to go out to eat with a coworker, so I supplied that as my answer.

"Oh," he was disappointed. Why was he disappointed? Don't be disappointed, dear awkward fellow! "I guess I'll have to just find something at my apartment."

Yes, sir, you would. But I just smiled and nodded in agreement. I opened my mouth to bid farewell and disappear, but he cut me off.

"So, you headed home?"

Confirmation.

"Where's that?"

I supplied the general location. Generally, so as not to allow him much knowledge than direction.

"That's about where I'm headed, too. I'll walk you home."

Okay, that's fair. We walked and small talk continued.

When we reached my apartment building, he told me where he lived. Now, remember, he'd told me he lived in the same general vicinity. However, the name he supplied was nearly a mile in the opposite direction.

I felt like I had been lured to dance practice with the intention of it becoming a date, not for preparatory purposes.

Rachel's tip:

If you have intentions on asking a girl out, make your intentions obvious. Don't try to sneak it under the table. You'll get caught. That would be worse than being honest from the beginning.

Best wishes, Rachel

Date Number Two

This week John asked me out for Saturday, again via text, to which I said yes [I realized afterward that I should have made him call. He’s not going to learn if I don’t teach him.]. We set a time for him to pick me up, with him calling later in the week to see if a different time would work better for me [Yes, he actually called.].

Saturday finally came and he picked me up from my apartment. Once again, I opened my own car door [Once again, totally fine.], and we headed to the sporting event we were going to watch which was a bit of a distance away. This left time for good conversation – always a good activity on a date. We parked a few blocks away from the arena and began our trek there.

On our walk we ran into a friend of John’s who had an extra ticket and offered to give it to him. He took it, but we still needed another one so we headed to the ticket office. We got to the window where he said, “You can get your ticket” [Why thanks. Guess it’s a good thing I brought my wallet??]. We headed inside for the game, where we sat on the opposing team’s side. Towards the end of the game it got kinda chilly, and I forgot my jacket in the car, so I had to just suffer through it and pretend to be fine.

On our way back to my apartment he asked if I was hungry, which I kinda was, so we stopped at a burger place where I got to pay for my own dinner. Don’t get me wrong, it was fabulous food, but I wasn’t expecting to pay then either.

He took me back to my apartment, where he walked me to the door and left with a hug. Ever since the date ended I’ve been in this weird haze just trying to contemplate what happened – was it a date or not?? Great. I have no idea.

Until next time, Robin

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Date Tip: I completely understand the want to split the cost of a date – they can be expensive! And I totally approve of paying Dutch on a date, it would just be nice to let the girl know beforehand. I mean, the ticket and dinner were both kinda pricy – and not money that I had planned on spending. It just would have been nice to know that I would have been paying for myself before I said yes.

First choice? Definitely not.

One Friday evening, you're sitting in the living room with your roommate Tabitha. Your roommate Kate had just gone to bed. There's a tap on the door, only to have the neighborhood creeper, Matt, walk in. Not that he's intentionally creepy...he's socially impaired. Dreading the worst, you finally pull the reason why he's mumbling on your couch. Date. He wants one. With Kate, thank goodness. However, Kate has been fighting a cough for the last month and a half, she had a very rough week, and she has work at 5 am the next morning. You shoo him off, letting him know she's asleep and to try back later. For the date he wants to go on tomorrow.

Fast forward.

Saturday, 5 pm. You and Kate are sitting in a friend's apartment, watching your favorite sports team win with style. Kate's phone goes off. Who do you think it is? Matt, of course. She politely declines the invitation. She's sick. You know.

Horror of horrors.... your phone goes off. You open it..... Matt. Shoot. Shoot, shoot, shoot.

Hello? He stumbles through a question about Kate and if she really is sick. Yes, yes she is. Then, he blunders his way through telling you he still needs someone for seven. Do you have plans? Yes. You do. Feeble ones created on the spot. He almost pleads... so FINE. You'll go. Even though you're obviously second choice, even to the most socially awkward fellow you can think of on the spot, even though he was seeking your ROOMMATE moments earlier, fine. You'll go.

Cue feeling lame.

He picks you up two hours and ten minutes later. Over the course of the date, he talks on the phone, he doesn't open the door for you, he almost doesn't pay for you, and when he does, it's in the most awkward fashion possible... conversation doesn't happen, and he keeps talking about how much he wants the date to be over, but due to the group nature of the date, he can't get you home. When you tell him an hour and a half into the date that you need to be home soon, he drops you off two hours later. This isn't for lack of trying. Sure, you didn't want to go on the date. Yes, you were asked in a fairly terrible manner, but you try to make it a positive experience. Finally, you just stop trying. You're too tired, too stressed, too hormonal to even give it an attempt anymore.

Rachel's tip for dating:

Treat the girl well. If you don't make an effort to make a girl feel special, the chances of her liking you drop significantly. At the very least, make an effort. Ask her out a few days in advance. This way, she'll have time to get excited and plan. Also, she'll feel more like you want to spend time with her and less like a last minute replacement.

Then, you go home and have pizza therapy and watch bad men die in terrible ways. And swear off dating.

Best wishes, Rachel

And So It Begins...

The night you have been waiting for all week is finally here, the night of your date. As you finish getting ready, you hear a familiar tune being tapped on the front door and one of your roommates rushes to answer it before you have the chance to scurry off with the mysterious visitor on the other side. After that darn doorstep scene at the end of the date, you enter the apartment to be bombarded by questions about the status of your evening. Through the laughter, and sometimes tears, the story of your date unfolds for all nearby to hear. Over the next few days, everyone you encounter hears of that night and are able to share in your pain, or joy, about the events of that one fateful evening.

Well, this is how it goes for me in my dating and social life. One night after sharing experiences with friends, we thought it would be fun to start sharing the stories of these fun nights and strange encounters with you, the Internet audience. Heck, if you can't laugh and share about some of these situations, they are not even worth going through! And we figured it would also be a good place to vent about the frustrating process we call dating, which sometimes gets to be a little ridiculous. Or a lot. So go ahead - read on, laugh loud, and enjoy!

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Date Tip: Do NOT ask someone out via text. We all know that texting is the less stressful way of talking to someone, but seriously, it's just taking the easy way out when it comes to dating. And it’s kinda lame. Just get up the courage and call them. I absolutely HATE talking on the phone and understand this temptation, but if you are wanting to ask someone out and get to know them, step out of your comfort zone for a quick minute and just talk. You're going to have to talk to them on your date anyway, right??

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So this week I was asked out by this guy, via text [hence the above venting], to attend a cultural event with him, to which I said I would. Friday night finally came, and after too much time studying on campus, I came home to get ready [Random observation - It's snowing again. Grr]. Right on time there was a knock at the door. None of my roommates were home so I answered the door, said hi, grabbed my purse and coat, and left with John*.

We walked out to his car, where he walked directly to his own door, allowing me to open my own door [Maybe I've been a little spoiled with guys opening my car door on dates?]. We drove to the venue and went to the performance, looking at artwork in the lobby area because we were early. There was good conversation, and some laughing in there too [always a necessity]. We watched the performance and then headed back to the car to head home, and he opened the car door for me. [Oh, and he was texting DURING the performance.] We headed back to my place, with him parking the car and walking me up to my door. I absolutely dread doorstep scenes and like them to be over as soon as possible, so after a quick joke and hug, we said goodbye and I headed inside.

*Names have been changed to protect the innocent

[Well, in this case the guilty, but I needed to put in a reference to the cop shows I watch so often.]

So, despite the lack of dating manners, I had a fun time. Maybe it'll be better on the second date... if there is a second date.

Until next time, Robin